HIS words..I love..

I was browsing my Facebook page when I stumble upon these words.. sent to me by HIM:

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"I want you  to know that  I have sent you ALLIES in this world..

There are people who can help you navigate your way through the world...

They can assist you in your healing and your growth...

Seek out people who are supportive and wise and loving and honest.

They will help you on your journey....."

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Reading this I know I'm gonna sleep better tonight...

Thank you GOD... you are my OASIS...

I love you so much!

 MARS

The Truck of Happiness...

It's been exactly  2 weeks and 1 day since Inay have joined our Creator.

Since then, we are all trying our best to cope with the sadness of not having her by our side. I refused to think that we have lost her, we all believe that she is just around, just invisible but still guiding us in everything that we do. I always joke about those people who made us all "api" during old old days.. I said that no body can do that any more to us, we have a good back up with Jesus now. They have to think twice before they do harm on any of us. hahahah...! Everyone knows that my mom never sheath her claws whenever she feels that any of her family is not being treated fairly.

So now everyday, Inay is our shining Sun and at night she is our guiding Star.

Tatay, Gel, Joi and I (Bok is now back in Dubai so he really misses the fun. nyeheheh).. bonds on reminiscing Inay's naughtiness. She is the family's baby. My tatay spoiled her rotten. And with all her naughtiness and scheming ways.. each and every one is trained  to deal with her with maximum tolerance! hahahahah..

She has a love affair with COKE.. errr.. not the drugs. I mean the Coca - Cola. So when I saw this video of the Coca Cola Happiness Truck (from Chuvaness) I had wish that Inay had the chance to "PUSH the Button".

Oh how happy she might have been.. she loves surprises..

This video made me smile ..and really made my day....

Dearest Inay

Dearest Inay:

The last three months were the most trying months for our family.

Just when I thought that things could never ever get worst, a huge wave of black clouds have loomed over our heads and  swallowed us mercilessly. On a sad day of March 13, Thursday.. you have given up with your battle with Cancer.

There were no words adequate to describe how painful those moments were for all of us. Nevertheless,I just want you to know that the last three months I spent taking care of you was the most fulfilling time of my life. I never regret those nights that I stayed awake with you. It was never easy but I cherished every seconds of it.

I am sorry I was not able to tell you EVERYTHING that the doctors were telling me about your condition.

You have no idea how devastating it was to hear that your system is refusing the medications being given to you. It was so hard to force my mind to accept the reality that your body is slowly and painfully deteriorating and that at any given time, you might leave us. 

I cannot tell you that, I should have told you, but I just couldn't. Not when I know that you are not yet ready to go.. Not when I know that you still believe that one of these days, you would still live normally and happily with all of us. I couldn't deny you of your hopes and your faith, now could I? God knows that up to the last time I was still praying for miracles... God knows!

But we all have to face the music.I was there to personally witness how the glow in your eyes started to fade. Gone was the warm smile that is always there. It pains me to look at your frail hands. It hurts to see your discomfort. Most of the time when you were in pain, I even asked God to let me share half of it or even all of it, just so you will be spared of any sufferings. If  only I could, I would even have traded half of my remaining life for you, but God has other plans..

I was there when you breathed your last...

Your  last words still echo to my ears.. "papakabait.. salamat... i love you... ingat... bahala ka na.." 

When the doctor said that you are gone, I know a part of me had died too.. 

I hope you will be proud of me that amidst tears and the sorrow.. I had  forced my self to get up and get things done. I have to face the torture of buying your last clothing, choosing your casket, sign some documents confirming you are gone.  I think it was the highest form of suffering any child could ever be subjected into.

Every single step was as painful as being stabbed a thousand times. The bitter taste of mortality  truly never leaves.. but we must all learn to live with it. You are not ours any more.

The question now is.. How can we ever say Goodbye?

There are so many things that I need to tell you and there are so many things that we want to do, WITH you on our side. 

But as they say.. God has other plans. The only thing we can do right now is to pray that you find peace as you cross the Great Divide. Tita Lucy said I should not cry, instead , I should celebrate the life that you spent here with all of us. She also said that you are now happy with our Creator and you are now in good hands and in a better place where pain and hardships never exist and where pure love reigns. I believe her. We have prayed for it and you deserve it.

Did you count how many times I said and I showed how much I love you? 

I hope you did....

because I lost count already.

Majen shared this poem to me:

(Poems for deceased moms)

MISS ME, BUT LET ME GO...

When I come to the end of the road
And the sun has set for me
...I want no rites in a gloom filled room
Why cry for a soul set free

Miss me a little - but not too long
And not with your head bowed low
Remember the love that we once shared
Miss me - but let me go

For this is a journey that we must all take
And each must go alone
It's all a part of the Master's plan
A step on the road to home

When you are lonely, and sick of heart
Go to the friends we know
And bury your sorrows in doing good deeds
Miss me - but let me go

I will miss you Inay... but I am letting you go.

I know someday, In God's time, we shall see each other again..

Salamat sa lahat.... I love you... 

...and don't worry, ako na ang bahala...

the Windows....

I have mention a lot of times that looking at the window or staying at the balcony is some sort of relaxation for me..

I could stay a full day at the balcony just observing people, looking over the views below absorbing  the activities of the world. I think I got it from my "Nanay" (that's how we call our grandmothers in Batangas, we call our grandfather "Mamay"), of whom, after returning home from the US, stayed with us in Antipolo.

I remember one time when I went for vacation 2 years ago, come 6pm in the afternoon, you will find her sitting at the balcony watching the planes flying over . I usually join her there and tell her what particular airline is flying base from their logos.. it is our bonding moment.

Here are some of my  " View Pics" , taken from almost anywhere.

Taken from the Taxi Window in Cairo, on the way to the airport..

Sienne River, Paris France

taken from the balcony while making "SAMPAY" the clothes at 3am, doing the laundry after work ...#buhayOFWlang

the best view.. from the kitchen sink while washing the dishes! 6am #buhayOFWulit!!

Behind our Building in Salahuddin, Deira Dubai.. view from the kitchen

 

MANILA, PHILIPPINES... view from the Hospital Ward..

Can you spot the Pasig River...? Reminds me of Raymart Santiago(when he was still hot!) and Geneva Cruz (when  her nose was still... REAL!)  (Anak ng Pasig! hahah) #classic!

Andoks, Botikang Pinoy

Got fascinated with the PROUD RED COLOR of the Building. then I realized.. Di pala sya Wholesome!

PROBINSYA

 

THE PASAWAY!

No Loading and Unloading Zone... deadma si Kuya!

BAWAL TUMAWID!!!

Ladies and Gentlemen.. the WAPAKELS....

ehehehehehe.... ala lang!

the Quickie.. Part 1.

 After two years I haven't been home, I have finally went home on an emergency leave..

My mom is ill.. and only my relatives and closest friends knows that I have flown home to see my Inay.

It's too painful to discuss it here.. but I have a strong faith that by God's will Inay will be OK. I have already claimed her healing and I am holding on to that.

Anyway, on a lighter note, I have managed to take some random pictures of just about anything that hits my attention. Since have stayed in the hospital 90% of the time, the places that I have been to are limited to the views from the hospital windows and on places on the way to home from hospital and vice versa. Here it is..

THE AIRPORT

touch base at 4pm Manila Time...

THIRD WORLD...

The same path I am always so excited to take...

Immigration..Welcome Balikbayans!

Long Lines for OFW lane in Immigration.. few on TOURIST.. haaayy..

If you would visit Bangkok, Thailand... you  would notice that there are very few Thai in que to the THAI NATIONAL Lane.. Whereas for the TOURIST lane 10 out of 10 slots are always full of people in que. In our case, OFW (Overseas Filipino Worker) lane is always full..meaning a lot of people are coming in from different parts of the Globe. Although I am also an OFW, and a proud one at that, I wish that time will come that, like Thai people, may we have few reasons to leave our own land. May the government find ways to help us sustain our needs without leaving the country and make us stay in the Philippines to be with our loved ones and be happy being just us... Filipinos!

 THE QUICK MEAL...

My brother Joi and cousins fetched me from the airport! First time it happened, so sad , it is always Inay and Tatay that I always first to see as I touch down Manila. Given the situation, I have been fetched by my BIG body guards... and when I say BIG.. I'm not exactly exaggerating.. here they are (minus my bro), this is my favorite photo of the GOONS! 

hahaha.. hey Guys! woot woot! Thanks for the trouble of fetching from and sending me to the airport as well. 'Til next time. (I treated them to Jollibee.. hehehee.. sorry guys no budget eh.. and I hope they enjoyed the meal though as much as I did.. )

As for myself i had a cravings for Tapsilog. On my way home one day, I dropped by TAPSI ni MOMSI point point (turo-turo). I had ordered these...

 

 At first I seriously thought that there was a dirt in my plate, when I saw it closely I was surprised it was the Tapa na pala! hahahaha... the servings of Food in Pinas is so small.. makes me feel like Gulliver eating in the world of Lilliputians! It was a great contrast in Arabic food servings, where a regular meal of rice and viand is enough to feed 3 people!

  

Anyways, since i paid only P38.00 for the Tapsi and P12.00 for the drinks.. that is roughly 5AED only..so it's not really that bad, I don't have the right to complain anymore. Never mind that it doesn't include water... the soup taste more like water ..with salt anyways! ewww... hahahahah

So ever wondered the first thing I did after I visited Inay at the hospital?  I ate green mangoes with lotsa lotsa bagoong at 2:00 am in the morning.!!

I had an immediate meeting with George Flush and Elizabeth Toilet right after! hahahahah

the hand baggage...

you cannot imagine how ridiculous some passengers' demands are in the airport..

just this morning I had a rough time telling one passenger that the baggage he is carrying can NOT, by any way, be allowed to be taken on board as a hand baggage...

he give me with one ugly look and one hell of a migraine before he left my counter... because he "cannot imagine why i cannot carry this as a hand baggage..this is too fragile to be checked in.."

and this ladies and gentlemen is his famous HAND BAGGAGE to be...  (if I allowed it. obviously.. I DIDN'T!)

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there is no way on earth that I can allow a baggage this big to be carried on board for obvious reason that even a 3 yr old could understand, except of course MY passenger.


-unless the passenger can squeeze himself in the overhead locker and let this big box take his seat instead, i might be tempted to consider, just to let him be miserable in the entire journey time...

who ever invented the saying  that "CUSTOMER is ALWAYS RIGHT " ..

need to seriously have his head be examined!

the old souk..one more time!

i love old stuff...

everything that reminds me of the bygone era fascinates me beyond measure...

i don't know.. but somehow i believe that i had once lived in old old days.. all of us did, if re-incarnation is really true.

the old souk in Bur Dubai is one of my favorite place here in UAE..

i would trade a few hours in there than going to some of Dubai's towering malls and world class establishments..

here are some of the pictures i took during my "day tour"  across the creek.. 

i love running my hands through these textured walls...reminds me of my childhood days when we are playing taguan pung  (hide and seek game).. i'm the "TAYA" all the time. since i have always been the ..err.. healthiest among the rest...haahhaha... they could easily see me as i can't hide properly and can't run very fast.

so that would make me facing the wall counting one to ten... 95% of the whole freakin game!

 i like these lanterns... and these whole wood-work.. 

Photo credit: Reuters

my favorite stop-over is the candy stores that lined up in the souk. they sell chocolates per kilo. they will give you free taste if you like. and when naughtiness hits me.. i'm gonna run-away after the free taste.

don't worry Karma is digital nowadays.. I always go home with toothache and half a pound heavier at the end of the day.

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So... how 'bout you my friend, what kind of old stuff makes you happy?